Anatomy.

So uhm we were talking about assignments. I got waken up at midnight to finish the remaining papers, and I asked Vixen why wasn't she sleeping yet. She'll have tentamen (a practical anatomy exam) the next morning so she has to study hard. I know it's damn difficult, the exam, they even named parts inside a small hollow on bones lol. Even a single scratch, it has a name. What is life of a med student.. This subject is one of million reasons I hate biology and chose engineering instead. Speaking of which, anatomy and I, we have history.

You know you remember that time in high school when we had to examine animal body parts. And seemed like that'd become everybody's favorite part in this subject, but not for me. For annelids I'm still fine with it, and fish also. When it comes to frogs.. lol now when I look back to when we had to cut open a frog, my partner must be really frustrated to be partnered up with me. Poor Feng, he had to do all the jobs while I just saw him from afar. Sorry to cause you so much trouble for the whole year Feng, and thanks for saving my practical exam score. I shall treat you dinner next time we meet. In case you stumble upon this blog, I just want to say I owe you a lot. 

Everybody said "Rena it's okay, it doesn't bite" "it doesn't jump on you" "it's not dangerous at all" "it's fun". Lol guise try to put yourself in my shoes. I can't just run the scalpel along their bodies without that torturous feeling inside that haunts me every time. And it gives me weird vibes whenever I see lifeless body. Plus basically I don't really like animals, alive or dead. Fun my ass. 

That was nothing compared to what happened when we visited anatomy lab in one of prestigious university. There were a lot of cadavers. Yes cadavers, lifeless bodies. Corpses. Dead people. Arms, legs, brains, they even have babies, the ones that born premature or deformed fetus. They also have a full body cadaver, which stored inside a see through coffin-like or something I don't know the name. I swear it was a lot scarier than any horror movies. Because of my reputation in anatomy class they pranked me lol thanks guise I couldn't stop thinking about it for the whole week. So I was examining a 6 month old fetus when they left me behind and locked me up with that full body cadaver. I'd probably be fine with it if it was a still in normal condition cadaver. But to be honest, I was pretty interested in observing cadaver I guess that's my favorite part in this subject. They called me weird for being more scared of animal corpse than human corpse. I was pretty good in human anatomy though, especially human reproduction lol who doesn't? Everyone in the class seemed to get an A+. I got B for my final score. And you must be wondering how did I pass the tests lol Idek it just happened. I think I've worked really hard. Though most of the biology classes I had suck big time, I was pretty popular in anatomy class. 

Ah good old times in high school. 

068 - Pursuit of Happiness

Earlier I found something interesting, and truly inspiring. 

His name is Taeho. Born with two legs, and speaks perfect korean. The first time you see him, you must have noticed it. He was born with disabilities and congenital deformity. Even doctor said he might not make it through the age of 10. But you know what he's 11 now. 

Life isn't unfair. 

Despite his disabilities, God gave him an amazing personality and lovely brother and sister. Sungil, Taeho's little brother has a mentality issues, but Taeho really cares about him. It's really amazing to see how cheerful Taeho is. No matter what happens, he can do anything by himself. He doesn't ask for help, never complains about his life, nor about anything. I feel so amazed when he does everything on his own, like brushing teeth, taking off his clothes, even using chopsticks. He never thought of giving up. He always smile. 

Aren't they cute?

I feel so ashamed.

When I complain on something little or some silly things, or when everything turns out the way I didn't want it to be, and the fml words just simply slipped out of my mouth...

I should be grateful for I have both arms, both legs, and a normal life. I guess in life it could always be worse. But this boy grew up with no arms, having the disabilities and being abandoned, yet he still be able to put a huge smile on his face. 

This 11 year old boy have touched my heart in every possible way and taught me a lot of things.

God bless you, Taeho. Please live long and grow up into a success and amazing person in the future :)

p.s : First day of finals was tough alsdkjf. Two down and still eight to go!

060 - Foolish April

It's April Fool's Day!

No I ain't gonna prank you.

Because it's always me who get pranked eventually otl. My friends pranked call me today because I didn't go to school. I caught a fever so I stayed home. But those heartless people called me and they said that anyone who didn't attend school today won't be allowed to send their college application letter wth -,- I was already on my way to shower with my hot temperature but then they called me again and playfully said APRIL FOOL'S DAY. 

How could they lie about this alskdflaksdf how could I not believe?

So umm... hi!

School's been crazy, but I'm not gonna say I'm tired. I do, but I have promised myself to hold on. And I ain't gonna whine :D

It's coming closer, the final exam, and the college entrance test. I'm gonna study harder and harder c:

Eating a self-made strawberry cheesecake like a boss! *proud* 

058 - Parfois

054 - Sourire

I'm not the kind of person who likes to camwhore. 

Because I know it won't come out good, no matter what. Maybe it's just because I'm not that pretty? Whatever.

Here I present you a selca of me to puke on.

And I love making weird faces.

LOL.

Anyway I finished my presentation about how radioactive decay works pretty good today, and it's really worth the hard work, since I stayed up until midnight to prepare all of that. I got an A :D

It's only Tuesday and I really want weekend to come faster alsdjkf I need more time to rest :\ Last weekend was pretty busy though, I thought we'll have the charity concert on Sunday, but they moved it on Saturday so yeah -_- I got an ME class to catch that day, so right after I finish I rushed towards Norwood. It was fun though :)

Chao is coming over Adelaide tomorrow. We'll shop around, along with Nate and Meg, and I get to accompany him shopping for the Chinese New Year. 

Oh, Charles had a trip to Bandung for a week. I had expected him to bring a lot of Indonesian foods but he didn't -_- I've been craving for Cheese and Banana Bolen though :s 

And,

I promise to go sleep early again today :D

Shopping spree tomorrow yay!

050 - Nouvelle Annee

It's finally come, 2011 is just a couple hours away now. Bye 2010, and thank you. For teaching me how to finally let go of something and move on. Ever heard of time heals?

I've been through so maaaaaany things within this year. Met awesome people and made friends, went to Waitemata, visited Bali, met old friends, my brother, my dad. I laughed like crazy, cried the hell out and many other things. I had the best birthday ever, I had my first performance on a big stage, I had the best Christmas dinner, I went to an audition and failed (lol -_-). And oh, I got my part time job for the very first time :) It was so amazing to feel that I can earn my own money and be independent. Not forgetting that I got my driving license too, just a couple weeks after my 18th birthday. And I drove all the way to Perth alone xD

My mom's marriage with Charles is the greatest things ever happened this year. She finally get over my dad and gets married with someone who truly and whole-heartedly loves her. I still remember the time she'd cry and throw things whenever my dad call, and I would always be the mediator between them. The hard times she had, was finally over. Charles Etienne Bass is a good guy. He's such a great buddy xD

And oh, this is my last post in 2010 right xD I want to take a break for 2011, keeping myself away from internet, updating tumblr, blogspot, twitter, youtube, including my fangirl life lol. I maybe will still go online, but not really often, unless on holiday or if I really have a free time. I want to concentrate on school now, getting my good grades back and I want to graduate with an excellent result and then get myself a place in university. FACULTY OF ENGINEERING is my goal. I have to get a freaking good grades and prove to those people that I CAN MAKE IT :D

Besides, doctor's verdict says I have some health problems, and I should get ENOUGH rest, which I've never done in 2010, I slept like maximum 5 hours a day -_- So that's why, I'm keeping myself from internet. Now my life is just school, sleep, pray, study, eat. Until I graduate and get accepted in university.

So, new year's resolutions: GRADUATE WITH EXCELLENT GRADES, GO TO UNIVERSITY, FACULTY OF ENGINEERING CLASS OF 2011, GO TO PARIS/KOREA, MEET 2NE1 XD

I hope everything will get better in 2011. I don't feel regret on what I've done this year, because I can't do nothing about it. I made mistakes, I screwed things, but all I can do is let go and move on. Because life goes on.

Happy new year's eve! Welcome new year, new life, new adventure, new me! :D

Vous voir l'annee prochaine <3

047 - I...

...will put the phone under the pillow whenever you call, and pretending not to hear it so that I'll have an excuse for not picking up your call.

That awkward moment when you ask me what happen on my sudden change of mood while you're the reason why.

Que dois-je faire? Que dois-je dire?

045 - Nouveau

We really don't know what will happen ahead.

One year, and I've been through so many things. 

I drove all the way to Perth a week ago, alone. That was the first time and the longest car driving I've ever had ;~; I met Chao, and some of his friends. And my SACE result will come out next few days. My class will be doing a drama musical of alice in wonderland, I'll be the red queen duh -_- We'll perform on Christmas :)

But now I'm on my holiday break, finally. I need some rest and relax my self cause I've been having a pretty busy weeks. Maybe I'll go to China Town next Tuesday with mom :3 Or shopping to Rundle, whatever, I just need to entertain myself -,-

Anyway, it's nearly new year. 2010 surely passes by sooo fast. 

But, I don't ask 2011 to be awesome, I just want it to be better than 2010 :)

Maybe... I shall write a new year's resolution later.

11/28

I'm tired.

Everyday I wake up at 5. Pray, and get myself ready for school. Then I'll have some minutes until 8 to go for school. I go home at least at 3, if there's no class that I should attend to catch up the subject material. Everyday I receive at least 5 pages of paperworks, and up to fifteen pages on weekend. I sleep normally around 10 or 12, or I sometimes stay up until 2 still doing my homeworks. I'm now all... exhausted. 

I'm human too, I don't have an endless stamina. I once ever thought to give up and quit, but I decided not to. I've already gotten this far, which isn't easy to come all the way here. It's been a year, and I realized I shouldn't have thought that way. This is the consequence that I must receive.

I have a goal, to enter the faculty of engineering in university, which requires you to excel in math and science. This isn't my mom's will or because she forces me to, but this is pure come from my heart, I want to enter the faculty of engineering.

Weird? Some of my friends said so. For a girl to enter an engineering, I got so many people laughed at me and mocked me. Well, there's this custom that a girl isn't supposed to do a guy's work. But hey, I love it and why can't I? My mom advised me to take medical school instead of engineering, but... no thanks. I just can't stand seeing blood and how the way it smells. She gave up and let me decide, but warned me about the consequence that I'll get. 

Honestly, I'm a straight A student. Since junior high I always on the top rank in class. I know everything in senior high is totally different in junior high. But I feel the obstacles and difficulties now are much bigger, now I have to do extra work to get those good marks. 

I whined and complained on how I get so many homeworks everyday, and I got no more times to hang out and play. Now I realize, I'm on my last year, final exams are getting closer, and I shall study hard. Maybe I should say thanks to teachers for giving a bunch of paperworks because that made me stay at home doing them on weekend instead of hanging out. 

You know you can do it, Renata. YOU KNOW YOU CAN. Just don't give up whenever you go through hard times. To achieve a big dream, all you need is to give all you have.