Dear Mom.

I know that you probably forget because you're busy with your job and all but today's Mother's Day in Indonesia so..

Mom, it's been a tough year for us, especially for you. You are the strongest lady I've ever seen, the most person I look up to, and you've always done your best as a mother for me and Mario. Even though I am nowhere close to the perfect daughter as you've expected me to be. There were times when I talked back to you, or when I didn't listen to your advice, when I made wrong choices, when I unintentionally let out hurtful words to you. I never meant any of those to hurt your feelings, even if I did, it was none of my intention. You know how teenagers are c: But despite of those, you always overwatch and protect me. I want to sincerely thank you for raising me to be the person I am now, for making sure that I grew up with so much love and care. 

I'm a grown up now, and almost not a teenager anymore. I still can't picture how my life will be when I start to not depending on you, though I'm beginning to learn for it now that I live far away from home for college. I still can't cook properly, sorry mom :c But don't worry I'll watch what I eat, and my roommate often cooks for the both of us, she understands my condition hehe. I promise I'll take care of my health, to get enough sleep and rest. I know you'll be worried sick if I fall sick and I don't want that, I want you to live happily and enjoy the new life you just got. Please be happy with Charles, give him the same love as much as you give to me. If he happens to do something bad to you just tell me so that I can kick his chubby ass loljk. I know he loves you just as much as I do.

Mom, I'm gonna be the person you're most proud of. Please be healthy and live well, just wait for that one day when you see me saying proudly "That's my daughter."

I love you Mom, more than everything. Happy Mother's Day ♥

Forgive.

No matter how worst the mistakes they've made in the past, everyone deserves to be forgiven. 

Living with anger and hatred for so long didn't make my life any better. I despised him with all of might and I even didn't feel like looking at his face anymore cause it would bring back the painful memories. They've been putting on an act all those times, and she was the only one in pain for covering his faults. I was fucking pissed off to no end when she revealed what had been happening. 

Holding on the grudge didn't change everything. In fact it started to tire me out. It has passed and the past can't be fixed. What is it to me anyway. Do I really wish him to be hurt as much as we did? Do I really wish him to finally realize he was wrong and crawl back to us begging for a forgiveness? That still won't change any of the ruined pieces. The once perfectly completed lego had been blown away, shattered and broken. We're now still gathering the remaining pieces and rebuild it back.

Now we're already on a completely different path. I just want to say thanks for letting us go. I wish you to have a nice life.

The huge scar you've left on us, it has healed in times. But the memories will forever remain.