Forgive.

No matter how worst the mistakes they've made in the past, everyone deserves to be forgiven. 

Living with anger and hatred for so long didn't make my life any better. I despised him with all of might and I even didn't feel like looking at his face anymore cause it would bring back the painful memories. They've been putting on an act all those times, and she was the only one in pain for covering his faults. I was fucking pissed off to no end when she revealed what had been happening. 

Holding on the grudge didn't change everything. In fact it started to tire me out. It has passed and the past can't be fixed. What is it to me anyway. Do I really wish him to be hurt as much as we did? Do I really wish him to finally realize he was wrong and crawl back to us begging for a forgiveness? That still won't change any of the ruined pieces. The once perfectly completed lego had been blown away, shattered and broken. We're now still gathering the remaining pieces and rebuild it back.

Now we're already on a completely different path. I just want to say thanks for letting us go. I wish you to have a nice life.

The huge scar you've left on us, it has healed in times. But the memories will forever remain.

I Don't Understand.

I was going to just shrug it off, but by the time went I get seriously annoyed.

I know this is unnecessary and I shouldn't make a big fuss about such thing, but seriously, what is your purpose by tweeting something that I've tweeted not long ago? Why did you copy what I've said? I don't get what's your motive but really? If you thought it was fine for you to tweet that when I was nowhere to be seen on your timeline, you're wrong, I was there and I saw you but I just didn't tweet anything. I thought twitter is a place where we can share about our thoughts, spazz, talk, and etc. Okay fine you can tweet aaaanything you want but that doesn't include tweeting the exact same thing I've tweeted, right? You know I follow you but seriously, what is your purpose? Are you tweeting to impress people? :| Because you are my friend, I'm telling you this. I'm not mad, this just annoys the hell out of me. 

You know who you are. Gue rasa gue gak perlu sebut merk.

Anatomy.

So uhm we were talking about assignments. I got waken up at midnight to finish the remaining papers, and I asked Vixen why wasn't she sleeping yet. She'll have tentamen (a practical anatomy exam) the next morning so she has to study hard. I know it's damn difficult, the exam, they even named parts inside a small hollow on bones lol. Even a single scratch, it has a name. What is life of a med student.. This subject is one of million reasons I hate biology and chose engineering instead. Speaking of which, anatomy and I, we have history.

You know you remember that time in high school when we had to examine animal body parts. And seemed like that'd become everybody's favorite part in this subject, but not for me. For annelids I'm still fine with it, and fish also. When it comes to frogs.. lol now when I look back to when we had to cut open a frog, my partner must be really frustrated to be partnered up with me. Poor Feng, he had to do all the jobs while I just saw him from afar. Sorry to cause you so much trouble for the whole year Feng, and thanks for saving my practical exam score. I shall treat you dinner next time we meet. In case you stumble upon this blog, I just want to say I owe you a lot. 

Everybody said "Rena it's okay, it doesn't bite" "it doesn't jump on you" "it's not dangerous at all" "it's fun". Lol guise try to put yourself in my shoes. I can't just run the scalpel along their bodies without that torturous feeling inside that haunts me every time. And it gives me weird vibes whenever I see lifeless body. Plus basically I don't really like animals, alive or dead. Fun my ass. 

That was nothing compared to what happened when we visited anatomy lab in one of prestigious university. There were a lot of cadavers. Yes cadavers, lifeless bodies. Corpses. Dead people. Arms, legs, brains, they even have babies, the ones that born premature or deformed fetus. They also have a full body cadaver, which stored inside a see through coffin-like or something I don't know the name. I swear it was a lot scarier than any horror movies. Because of my reputation in anatomy class they pranked me lol thanks guise I couldn't stop thinking about it for the whole week. So I was examining a 6 month old fetus when they left me behind and locked me up with that full body cadaver. I'd probably be fine with it if it was a still in normal condition cadaver. But to be honest, I was pretty interested in observing cadaver I guess that's my favorite part in this subject. They called me weird for being more scared of animal corpse than human corpse. I was pretty good in human anatomy though, especially human reproduction lol who doesn't? Everyone in the class seemed to get an A+. I got B for my final score. And you must be wondering how did I pass the tests lol Idek it just happened. I think I've worked really hard. Though most of the biology classes I had suck big time, I was pretty popular in anatomy class. 

Ah good old times in high school. 

Back.

It's been a week since I came back to college! 

And I'm back to face the usual hectic college life. The non stop assignments are messing up my sleeping schedule even worse. Classes start 9 to 2 or 4, or 6 or 7 when I have extra classes. Sobs I should hang on until the holidays come ughhh happy timessss why do you seem so long.

Anyway, I want to be able to blog regularly again but I sometimes don't have the feel to do so because of the assigments. I should try! And it's been ages since I post the regular post owipqopoq the last time I came here was just to rant. 

Eid mubarak at Aunt's house was a lot fun, the fooodsssssss omg I think I gained some pounds that time. My chubby cheeks were getting chubbier than ever lol but hey I'm back to normal rn :) My mom still at my aunt's place so I hope she'll be back soon safely. 

I still suck at cooking. My housemate is pretty good at cooking fortunately, but she can only do several dishes so we'll sometimes have three same menus in a week haha I don't mind though as long as it's edible ;u; 

It's gekikara ramen! Tastes dangerously good lol it's so spicy and a bit hot but it doesn't burn your tongue. Instant ramen of course, do you expect me to cook this by myself -_- Even I suck at cooking instant ramen orz the soup was all gone cause it lacked so much water.

When I thought gekikara tastes the bestest my housemate made udon noodles cause her family packed her the ingredients and I immediately take those words back lol. She made a huge portion for us \o/ Asian foods are the bestest \o/

Say hello to my new baby!

I get this few months ago, a samsung galaxy tab s1. My mom suddenly brought this home for me I didn't even know why lol. My current phone is getting old. I don't really often use this one though, cause when you make a phone call it's really loud and you have to use an earpiece or people will hear the whole conversation. So for now I'm still using my lubly E63. I still have to save money to buy new cam though :3

Gotta spend another day at home to rest my sprained ankle!